The Cousin
by Merodii-chan
Summary: Ren's cousin comes for a visit over an autumn holiday, and Ren's defenses are completely shattered. Of course, with the brave, yet stupid, Horohoro there to help him, taking care of this cousin's every whim should be no problem, right? (Hororen)
1. Ren's Despair

The Cousin  
Chapter One: Ren's Despair  
Rating: PG  
Pairings: Ren/Horo, Jun/Lee  
Humour/Romance

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Shaman King! XD And I can't think of anything witty to put here!

"Oh, Lien! I've some wonderful news!!"

Ren looked up, mildly interested, from the open volume in his lap, "What is it, big sister?"

"Mei Ling!" she replied happily as Ren took a sip of tea, only to spit it out in shock.

"Mei Ling?!"

"Yes! Isn't that wonderful?! We haven't seen her for ages!"

"No!" Ren sputtered indignantly, the tome on his lap all but forgotten, "It's not wonderful at all!"

Tao Jun stopped abruptly in mid-happy dance, "Why? Don't you miss her?"

Ren mumbled something incoherent and irritable under his breath.

"What?" Jun demanded.

More mumbling, and then the violet-haired boy replied simply, "She's an insufferable brat!"

"Ren!" Jun gasped, "Do not talk about your family that way!"

The boy-in-question arched an eyebrow, "Jun... This is the Taos we're talking about... You know, killing, torturing, kidnapping... All that."

"I was trying to prove a point," Jun simply stated in reply, although Ren did have a point, "Besides, Mei Ling's done nothing wrong."

And with that, Jun disappeared through the door to retrieve the dreaded Mei Ling Tao.

Mero: Well... It's very short... That's how most of the chapters of this story are... (xD You see, I already have the first six chapters written, but only the first three typed. I'll probably post Chapter Two after Christmas... or maybe tomorrow. shrugs) Please review! And tell me if anything could be improved!


	2. The Telephone

The Cousin  
Chapter Two: The Telephone

Disclaimer: See Chapter One. XD

"Chocolove?" Ren yelled desparately, "Chocolove!!!"

Riiiiiiiing... Riiiiiiing...

"CHOCOLOVE!!!! PICK UP THE PHONE, DAMMIT!"

No use. Ren slammed t he telephone down on the table, muttering a rather rude string of curses under his breath, before picking up the phone once more and violently dialing another number.

Riiiiiiing. Riiiiiiing. Riiiiiiiing. Click!

"Hello?"

"Yoh! Is that you?!"

"Yeah... Ren?"

"Yeah, listen. I need you to come over here now! Bring Amidamaru... Hell! Bring everyone! NOW."

"Can't. Training. See ya, Ren."

"Wait!"

"What?"

"Who else can I call?"

"Hmmm... Try Boroboro and Pilika."

Cliiiiiick.

"Dammit!!!" Ren yelled, slamming the phone down once more, and, again, picking it up, but this time dialing Horo and Pilika's place.

Riiiiiiiiiiiiing–"Hello?"

"Pilika? This is Ren. You and Horo get your asses over here right now!!!"

"Try being a little more polite!"

"Just get over here!"

"No!!!!" The blue-haired girl yelled at the receiver, "Call again, and be a little nicer, and maybe then I'll consider it!!!" Click.

Ren slapped a hand against his forehead, and, again, dialed the Usui number.

Riiiiiing. Riiiiiing...

"Hello?"

"Hello, Pilika!" Ren said with a noticably fake cheeryness, "Can you please come over here now?"

"Erm... This is Horohoro."

"Ergh!"

Horo heard a dull bang through the telephone, most likely Ren's head against the nearest wall, "Ren?"

"What?!"

"Is there something wrong?"

"Oh, no... There's nothing wrong. Nothing wrong at all."

Horo almost hung up, having been thoroughly creeped out, but then Ren continued speaking.

"My cousin from hell isn't coming to visit, and I certainly don't need any help!"

The corner's of Horo's mouth subconsciously lifted into a smirk, "Are you asking me for help?"

Ren mumbled something along the lines of "slightly..."

"Oh," the smirk grew a little wider, "of course... I'll need the right pay..."

"Just get your ass over here!"

"I'll be right over."

Click.

Ren hung up the phone and sighed, a mixture of dread and relief.


	3. Mei Ling's Arrival

The Cousin  
Chapter Three: Mei Ling's Arrival

"Pilika!" Horo shouted, "I'm going to Ren's!"

"Whatever!" the blue-headed girl cried in reply from her bedroom, "Just don't be back too late!"

"Okay! See ya'!"

Horo stepped out into the autumn air with a huge grin on his face.

Ren had started to Mei Ling proof the house. Well... his stuff, anyways. Bringing the girl over was Jun's idea, so Ren thought it only fair that Jun's be the only stuff that got destroyed by the wrath of their cousin.

The next few minutes he spend covering his furniture in plastic, hiding the good food, and making other such devious preparations. Until... there was a knock at the door.

Ren practically jumped for out-of-character joy as he spotted a flash of blue hair through the front door window.

"Horohoro!" the purple-haired boy cried, slinging the door open, "Thank you for coming!"

"Wow," Horo replied, smiling slightly, "you've never been so happy to see me before."

Ren instantly began to feel heat rising up his collar and blossoming over his face from the tips of his ears.

"Sorry," Ren mumbled, trying to regain his composure, "I just need your help."

Snicker, snicker. "You need my help."

"Oh, shut up."

"YOU need MY help."

"Hmph!"

"You NEED my help."

Ren turned on his heel, face-to-face with the annoying bluenette, their faces inches apart, and Ren sporting a menacing glare and a low growl, "How many times must I tell you to SHUT UP, you incompetent dunderhead?!"

"A lot," the snowboarder replied casually, smirking and stalking off into the kitchen with an air of superiority about him.

"Kisama!"

At that, the Ainu turned to face the Chinese shaman, slowly, menacingly, and made his way back to the Tao. They stood face-to-face, harsh, glaring, fists clenched...

And Horo burst out laughing.

Ren dropped his guard and rolled his eyes exaggeratedly. Horo could be such an idiot at times.

"Okay, Ren," Horo said a few seconds later, still stifling giggles, "What do you need my help with?"

At that exact moment, a key turned in the front door lock, and the door slowly swung open.

"That," Ren pointed fearfully to two figures standing in the doorway. One was Jun, and the other...

Mei Ling Tao.


End file.
